The Realization That Made My Client Cancel Her Appointment (In the Best Way)
We’ve been taught that losing weight will fix everything—from our confidence to our energy to the way we move through the world. But the truth is, it doesn’t work that way.
I’ve had many clients come to follow-up appointments frustrated that they aren’t losing weight (or aren’t losing weight as quickly as they’d like to), despite making great progress otherwise.
One client, in particular, was grateful for all the positive changes she had experienced since we started working together. She had more energy, less body pain, and was able to exercise more. Best of all, she wasn’t hungry all the time, and the obsessive thoughts about food that had once taken up so much space in her head were finally starting to quiet down.
And yet, despite all of that progress, she still sat across from me in tears and told me, “I still need to lose weight.”
So I asked her the question I ask every client when weight loss comes up: “What do you hope will be different if you lose weight?”
Her first answer came quickly: “I’d finally be able to do a pull-up.”
That’s a fair assumption—less weight to pull up seems like it should make the move easier.
The truth is, doing a pull-up isn’t about being smaller—it’s about building strength.
She laughed through tears when I asked her: “Do you think Dwayne Johnson can’t do a pull-up? He’s well over 200 pounds—and definitely can.”
I then asked, “Could you do a pull-up when you were at a lighter weight?” Her answer was no. Case closed.
That realization landed for her, and I encouraged her to start training for it in a way that focused on building muscle, not losing pounds.
Her second answer went even deeper. She told me she wanted to travel, but she felt like she couldn’t in her current body. She dreamed of backpacking through Europe, but her fears about stamina, taking up space, and being judged were holding her back.
The ironic thing? Since we’d started working together, she already had more energy and was moving her body more consistently.
I shared with her what I had noticed on a recent trip to Italy: people of all ages and sizes were exploring the world, some using canes, walkers, or wheelchairs. If they could do it, why couldn’t she—an able-bodied, 34-year-old woman?
Again, she laughed through tears and admitted, “You’re right. I hadn’t thought about it that way.”
A few weeks later, she sent me this message:
And that’s the bigger point I want you to hear too: yes, physical limitations can exist in any body size. But don’t let the belief that you have to lose weight first stop you from living the life you want right now.
You don’t have to shrink your body to expand your life. The energy, confidence, and freedom you’re craving aren’t waiting at a smaller size—they’re available to you now.
When you stop chasing weight loss as the solution to everything, you can finally focus on what truly makes you feel strong, nourished, and alive.